Miracle Moments

I don't know exactly what I want to say tonight. So I'll just type--and let the feelings roll out... My five sons and I just left counseling...and I'm emotionally spent. I imagine they are too. It was tough...but one of the most successful sessions thus far. I cried, one of my older sons cried, anothers eyes welled up....and the rest chimed in with their soulful reflections of life in our broken family. Yes-we're broken, battered and bruised...but not destroyed. In fact, as hard as this seems...it's clear to me-we're getting stronger every single day. It takes a lot of courage to call out for help and to honestly hear what each person is really trying to say. A lot of people I know will never go there...to get help, to seek guidance or to listen to what we are doing to hurt the ones we Love. But we're doing it...and I'm grateful-to my sons for standing in the line of fire. I took some emotional hits tonight...and rightfully so--but I'm relieve

"Tis the season-to be-grateful for your family. For the gift...for the dynamics and for the Love that comes within the family unit that God uniquely delivered to each one of us. We often take that for granted-and sometimes discover too late--that family is the sole purpose and the only profession that really ever matters. Sure it can get complicated...different personalities-different desires--dumb disagreements and dirty little lies...But-like it or not--we're in this together...and united we stand, divided we fall. Having traveled the world -I've discovered every culture has its own unique family codes...expectations and internal language. But that's just the window dressing...Because when you get right down to it--God designed our families- for our eternal benefit...It's where we learn the lessons of Love, compassion, patience, service...and the true value of our fundamental gift, the gift of life. My favorite role model is the Holy Family. They stuck togethe

Can you imagine-being in labor--far from home--and no room at the hospital or the hotel or the Inn?! Think about it...no vacancies anywhere...except-inside a stable surrounded by animals and hay and dirt. No deluxe, single room...no white sheets or fluffy pillows, no monitors or anaesthesia...no doctors or nurses or heart monitors...just mom and dad...and a huge dose of faith. This is the night, Mary and her husband Joseph--after traveling miles and miles by donkey, traveling day and night...sought refuge... so their only son...the baby Jesus-could be born. And that is exactly what happened...The Christ child came into the world in an obscure setting, with no fanfare, or friends or relatives standing by...just his parents...and of course- God. Humble beginnings for the child who Christians will agree-would become the single most important figure in the history of humanity. A carpenter's son, a mother anointed like no other-a prophet and a savior...the Bethlehem babe-hailed hope, ho

"It's a death field out there...It's eat or be eaten!" "What?!" I replied..."What are you talking about?" My 11 year old son Jacob ran inside, poured himself a glass of milk and exclaimed, "Why don't they just give up-Mack and I are winning every time." "Ben and Zack don't stand a chance!" "It's getting to the point that it's not any fun--they're desperate!" Just four of my five sons "frolicking' outside on the front lawn...football style. Yes it's rough-I carried out some trash and I wanted no part of it. But they were laughing and lunging and letting it all hang out--old fashioned brotherly Love! No one can ever accuse my brew of being sissys or wallflowers or quiet as mice...believe me-no one--unless they're deaf, dumb and blind...You can hear them for miles around...most of the time...except when they're sleeping soundly--(silently slumbering like their 23 year old brother i

The Blessed Mother is standing on the front lawn--around the corner and a few blocks from my house. She appeared this week out of nowhere...inside her own private grotto, surrounded by roses, for all the world to see...or at least all the cars passing by her busy little street. I was so touched seeing her there...tall and grey stone, arms outstretched...welcoming passersby- reaching out in motherly care...offering her heavenly embrace, right here on earth. She stands on dry, well manicured land...where a river of floodwater once flowed, filling the streets and the homes with washed away memories in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina...and she stands now, for strength and hope and the promise of a bright future--because God is with us...and her son is among us--in every random act of kindness, generosity and goodwill that we have given freely and lovingly to those who least expect it. I did not expect to see her there...in front of this lovely new home...that I have passed countless ti

Jacob's face is deflating...the swelling almost gone...the penicillin working wonders. X-rays at the dentist showed nothing...so it was on to the doctor... who diagnosed a swollen gland...caused by an infection...how or why-we don't know...but we'll keep a watch and hopefully the coast is clear from here on out... Zachary (and I) got an At on the volcano--so once again- "mother knows best" as I always remind my boys...The grand finale-made the cut, without all the headaches and scurrying around like years past... Tonight we put up our dazzling Christmas tree...somehow we're all laid back...took out the one we stored in the attic...dressed her up...and ta da...we're happy! I don't know what it is, but I guess we're simply grateful for being home...with our family in tow...and the bountiful blessings of health and happiness...So all the window dressings seem like extras-- Besides, Christmas lives at our house year round...We own a full size snow s

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people He said, "My son, the battle is between two 'wolves' inside us all. ONE IS EVIL. It is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority and ego. THE OTHER IS GOOD. It is joy, peace, Love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith." The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf wins?" The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed." (A friend sent me this story inside a Christmas card...I don't know who the author is...But I feel it is poignantly powerful...worth reading over and over again.)

My son Jacob came home today looking disfigured. The right side of his face, swollen like a ball...fever caused a throbbing headache...and fear made him cry. He knew he was headed to the dentist...maybe an abscess...certainly a shot. He's been there and done that and for a child...and probably for most adults...it's a trip he'd rather see re -routed. But you know the story--there's no room at the Inn---until the morning...so the best I could accomplish is a penicillin prescription, some Motrin for the swelling...and a whispered prayer for relief. You see-when it rains it pours. This is exam week...tomorrow are two critical exams...Math and Science...and neither pique Jake's interest. In fact, those are facts he'd rather shelve in exchange--for just about anything else. You see-like st. Augustine, Jacob likes thinking about the unthinkable...reaching for the stars instead of counting them...analyzing the heavens...instead of calculating how to get there. But ever

I sat in the last row at morning mass... not feeling too well...But then -watching in silent wonder as the singing souls stood in unison...collectively rising to the occasion...praising and worshiping a God they could not see...but whom they deeply believed in. If you think about it--and really see-through the eyes of faith...watching the faithful in church is an amazing spiritual exercise...It is the essence of everything we are lead to believe about community and equality and unity. It is the one place that people put down their humanity and pick up their divinity--without all the baggage and worry of judgement or jaundiced attitudes. It is the one place where the soul within, the driving spiritual force that finds it's way into-even a fools physical fortress--the one place- where we get an authentic glimpse of our spiritual brothers and sisters. Standing side by side, singing songs of soulful Love-or being silent and still and slowing down just long enough to catch up with the o

Volcanoes are not rocket science! I made one today-with my 10 year old son. In between studying for exams and running kids to basketball practice or games or washing clothes-I made a volcano. So much for the day of rest. I've made so many volcanoes-I think I'm actually getting the hang of them. Zachary wanted to know why we weren't using the play dough and the chicken wire and all the other things his brother used on his volcano last year. Without missing a beat I answered, "Because I got smarter-that's why. I learned something-Keep it simple!" I added, "It will probably turn out better."--and I think it did! Isn't that what school is all about-learning a lesson for the next go round-expanding our horizons and our understanding. Well-I don't know about the kids--but I learned a valuable lesson. Making volcanoes doesn't have to be that complicated or that expensive. Most of the stuff we need is right in front of our faces. The only thing I

"Due to the energy shortage, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off." How funny is that bumper sticker?! But really-how shocking would that be?! How would we know if we were crossing into the light or into the dark? Upstairs or downstairs? The rays of sunshine that seem to greet near deathers could fade away into the dreary fog...if the spiritual energy igniting the flames of burning Love were too weak...muted by the mighty call of the wild--and wonderful world we all revel in down here. Think about it. Sometimes we take for granted that God is going to be there--waiting endlessly for our fannies to march to a different drummer. We seem to think we have all the time in the world...until the next world...to make our mark...even when the messes we make-mess up the important milestones we're supposed to meet. I've never seen the light--at the end of the tunnel I mean--but I've interviewed people who have been there-and lived to tell about it...Unanimo

Pure as the driven snow? Hardly! But today-New Orleans looked virgin... A pristine powdery white blanket of snow ...lay bare...wrapping itself in soft, silent protection around the city....from Bourbon street to Kenner, uptown -across the mighty Mississippi...to the Westbank...around Lake Pontchartrain...to the Northshore up and over rolling hills...all the way to the swampy marshlands and bayous of Louisiana. God sent a surprise sunrise that dropped from the heavens this glorious, glistening mantel of protection...that seemed-for a few hours--to purge our land--and produce the most childlike innocence -a winter wonderland--of promise and hope and joyful expectation. The powdery crystals of water and ice gently inspired a deeply spiritual connection between this world and the next...reminding me that God sees exactly what we need-when we need it the most...that Heaven is closer than we think and that the simplest miracles---the most unexpected wonders are waiting to drop in on us...som

Honesty- may well be the most difficult moral challenge facing any us. Honesty with ourselves- with each other-with our higher power. Honesty eludes so many of us because we are simply afraid to tell the truth. Plain and simple--we are afraid to tell the truth. Who knows why or where the fear comes from that leads to the dishonesty...but walls go up and lies lay the foundation and the future is fueled by false fantasies of what we want to believe is true--when deep down inside we know that we are lying. There's often no pre-meditation...no planning involved...no overt decision to be covert about the facts..The little white lies just roll out of our mouths, cloud our minds and our memories, until we begin to believe the mysterious tall tales and the seemingly innocuous remarks that are in fact outrageously outlandish lies. Some of the most honest women I know, tonight-honestly shared the dishonesty of their former lives--with a mixture of laughter, disbelief and absolute-relief. It

God always has the last word. But we are always the beneficiaries. December 8th is the Feast of the Immaculate Conception. The day Catholics celebrate the wisdom of God's beautiful handiwork...exempting the Mother of Christ, from original sin...excluding sin from entering her soul...granting her this singular privilege...for the benefit of humankind. It is a soul stirring sign of the connection between our humanity and our divinity. Mary, the new Eve...who would become the mother of the new Adam, Jesus. The salutation of the Angel Gabriel, "Hail, full of grace.." (Luke 1:28) indicates an abundance of grace...a supernatural godlike state of a soul...which finds its explanation in the Immaculate Conception of Mary. It is mindboggling to consider...heartwarming to realize...that God--the master of all creation--anointed one human-a woman...by giving her a special pass to enter this life, without the stain of original sin...to be placed in her mother's womb-free and clear

I'm grateful when people listen--and even sometimes -when they overhear. My son's friend called tonight to tell me, "You are the standard bearer for your children." I paused-wondering if that was a good thing or not. Yesterday, Emile rode up to my house on his bike and overheard a rather emotional conversation outside. He apologized for intruding but wanted to let me know how he repaired his estranged relationship with his parents. Staying calm-even under fire--staying focused--even when things got rocky and learning that self control was his best defense as well as his best offense. Pretty smart guy. And he added, "Don't let your anger get in the way of the ones you Love." Don't I need to hear that--over and over again?! Now this is a guy who has been tested by fire...schizophrenic, suicidal, bi- polar, recovering addict...and incredibly brilliant. He has struggled to re-gain his sense of himself, his personal purpose and his will to live...and he h

Sometimes you just have to feel the pain. There's no way around it...and the best way to deal with it--to work through it-is to feel it. Pain is the sign of an open wound...physically--emotionally--a wound that needs time to heal. Working with the pain and through it--is critical--because there is some pain-that try as we may--cannot be ignored-forever. It festers, boils up and eventually penalizes us for placating its purpose...Because there is always a purpose...a reason why we feel pain and a lesson to be learned from it. For years I turned my back on my pain, buried my feelings and ran from the obvious. But I've learned the hard way-the painful truth...Ignoring the pain, only makes things worse, adds insult to injury and eventually causes greater pain than we ever imagined possible. So hang on to your power to overcome the pain...putting your priorities in line...putting you first--until you've released that part of you that clung to the pity and the past and the pathet

Like the energizer bunny she kept on ticking...until her last breath at 115 years young. The oldest living person to cross over-is our reminder of the age defying odds which we can all overcome. You know what they say--it's all in the mind...but sometimes-it comes straight out of the mouth--with little or no thought. I was stunned to hear the sermon-"I know most of us don't want to die-but who wants to live to be that old? Other than her heart beating-what is the quality of her life?" I whispered to my son, "Has he forgotten about her spirit within...her eternal soul...her higher supernatural dimension?!" Call me naive, call me idealistic...or call me anything at all-- but -until her last breath--her quality of life rested in every breath she took. As long as she was breathing-as long as blood pumped through her veins--she had purpose and possibilities and people who loved her. She had value! We are both spirit and matter--internal and external...And our per

I cracked open the fortune cookie-and there in black and white...my fortune- "YOU HAVE A REMARKABLE POWER YOU ARE NOT USING" Like I haven't heard that before. But really-what power might that be? Think about it...we all have a power we are not using and a purpose we are not fulfilling and a person we should be persuading...and I think the list goes on...So how do you really know what power it is--rather- what "remarkable" power it is-that you are not using. Me--I've got a few good ideas...but I'm afraid to share, because if it's so remarkable...maybe I better wait until I put my power to work, lest I give someone else my idea and then they steal what is meant to be my personal, remarkable power. It's funny though-because I know exactly why I got that fortune cookie and I know exactly what remarkable power I am not using, but which I am carefully cultivating so that I can move it into motion. Timing is everything...and I am waiting for just the ri

They say honesty is the best policy. They're right. Whoever they are. He asked me to speak at an AA meeting-I said yes. Usually that means ten minutes of dishing our feelings then letting others chime in. Not today--somehow he had forgotten to tell me the last Saturday morning of the month is the "speaker" meeting...the full hour of sharing the sobering truth about ones recovery. Didn't think I could talk that long...but-what the hell, I'd give it a try. I made up my mind this morning-- at that moment-- that I would say whatever God inspired me to say--that I would break the silence--silence that only served to keep me submerged in humiliation and shame. I told them I've never shared the intimate details of my recovery, because I had been trying to "protect" the "innocent." But sometimes-while we're protecting others--we're also protecting ourselves -from the embarrassment, the rejection and the personal failures that come with the

Open your heart and you will see with the eyes of faith. Always be grateful for the gifts of your experiences and the wealth of your knowledge...always remember that life is a learning experience...and every challenge a tool to fine tune who you are destined to become. See your world through the eyes of faith...and follow your heart straight to where the spirit is guiding you... God never lets you down-if you stay close--he never fails you-if you believe...God gives you an abundant return on your investment-if you simply surrender it all... Every second of every day God is gracefully guiding your life...So let down your guard, listen with love in your heart...and let his gratitude redeem you. If you get with the program now, the world will be a better place tomorrow...Your life will have richer meaning, your friends and family will find peaceful prosperity and the spiritual sunshine within will brighten the dawning of each and every new day. Keep it simple, keep it real...and as I alwa

Racism is alive and well-in Louisiana. I couldn't believe the discussion I heard today at a Thanksgiving feast. And I couldn't be more proud of my 23 year old son-who calmly, intelligently and compassionately defended the honor of an entire race of people. I'm not from Louisiana-though I've lived here since college...But I still cannot wrap my mind around the kind of bizarre rhetoric that renounces the very dignity of the human person--simply because of their skin color. No-no one used the N word...but they might as well have...In "intellectual" circles- racism goes under cover...It's their attitude, their judgements, their call for accountability from the poorest of the poor. I couldn't contain myself...so I said my peace then quickly exited. I've learned it does no good to argue with right wing extremists...closed minded people sometimes are as we say in AA-- "constitutionally unable or unwilling" to accept the simple truth...poverty ex

Make someones day better. Smile at a stranger, lend a helping hand, give a few minutes of your time...and listen-really listen to what someone is trying to say. Show compassion and concern and care for your neighbor. Let someone know how much they mean to you-to the world-to your God. It is so easy to let the seconds and minutes and hours slip away...taking our lives and the lives of our loved ones for granted...So set your sights on the precious gifts of grace that have given you opportunities to get to know so many of God's children...living souls sent by a loving God--to share in our humanity. This week we give thanks for so many good things...let someone know you are giving thanks for them...You'll make them smile and help them feel good about themselves and about you...And you'll let them know that they are valued--and victorious, because their life matters-to you and to the rest of us. It's the little things we do that are the big things of life...So-do something

Pray, pray, pray... In 27 years the message has been the same--Pray. Saturday night-around the corner from my house--the faithful packed into church pews and stood in the aisle...to hear the man who has been speaking daily with the Blessed Virgin Mary--Ivon Draicevic. And on this night, like every day since he began seeing this heavenly vision-Ivon told the crowd--to pray--daily, fervently and from the heart--just pray--for individual peace, peace within families...and for peace in the world. I first heard that simple pleading when I interviewed Ivon in 1986 in Medugorje...in Bosnia Hercegovina...He and five young people had been seeing and speaking to the "Queen of Peace" since 1981...And from the beginning the consistent message has been an urgent call for prayer---prayer which has the power to change lives and to change the world. Married with children, Ivon has grown up...and grown accustomed to the attention and the adulation and the lack of autonomy...He is world renown

Big Ben's the birthday boy! Fifteen and counting. The tried and true tumultuous teen years are under way...Every parent knows this rite of passage. Drivers Ed for the kids...sleepless nights for the parents. Ben's a great kid...middle child, mild mannered-easy going...studious and kind...But don't make him mad--the scorpio is sensitive and sure to let you know. For some reason-I'm not shuddering this time around. After tangling with his two older brothers I have no illusions...I know what to expect--but Ben--is different...handles his decisions with reflective confidence...and stubborn, matter of fact grounding. Some kids seem to maneuver their minds in a straightforward motion--instead of taking giant steps backward. Ben reminds me of me. Uh Oh! Growing up smack dab in the middle means more time is spent on others, than yourself...making self serving ideals less important...until you've had enough and rebel...like I did-eventually. But gentle Ben is strong and deci

We are powerless...over so many things. Except prayer. Prayer is a power-- beyond the people, places and things that drive us insane. It is the power behind our personal will--when our will is turned over to our higher power. There isn't much in life that we can actually control--except our own choices. And so often, we make believe that our choices are the best decisions we can make. When in fact-our power to choose is directly influenced by the power and the perseverance of our prayer and our will to surrender everything that we are--to God. I learned that tonight again in talking with the ones I love. We don't always get what we want, or even what we are convinced we need...and tonight was one of those nights. Sometimes we expect too much from people...because often, it is much more than they have to give. Sometimes we want them to be better-for us-but they are content to be mediocre-for themselves. And sometimes, we try to control their bad behavior, when bad is the best th

It's easier to do it now-than later. Purgatory that is. My son Jacob-the eleven year old sage-reminded me---you face the facts now...or later...but some time, some way, some how...we all have to come clean. The family's in counseling and it seems some of us are showing our colors-while others are not. Fear, insecurity, denial, ego, sickness...a myriad of melodramas make our minds unable to let loose of the old mistakes and blunders. Jake and I were discussing this-when he very matter of factly stated that those of us who are being honest now...facing our fears and our falls... are actually going through our personal purgatory right here on earth...before we find ourselves on the other side of eternity. He reminded me, no one escapes the life review...or the uneasy feelings...or the mistakes we've made...no matter how hard we try or how hard we try to hide from our past. It seems one of his teachers, a Christian Brother, had been discussing purgatory in class...and advised

Absentee dads. Fathers who are M.I.A. Children who are missing out. It is an epidemic that is hurting the most vulnerable-our children. In my small circle-it is astonishing to see how many one parent homes there are...how many moms trying to play mom and dad...when dad is too busy or too self absorbed to care. We wonder why so many kids are troubled, or in trouble or trying to stay out of trouble. It is no wonder they turn to drugs and alcohol, crime and sometimes suicide. Father and child bonding promotes the positive physical, social, emotional and mental development of children. While children raised in single parent families are more likely than children raised in 2 parent families to do poorly in school, have emotional and behavioral problems...become teenage parents, commit crimes, smoke cigarettes, abuse drugs and alcohol and have poverty level incomes as adults. So what do we do-when there's only one parent? Remember -that the most important factor in a child's upbringi

Don't sweat the small stuff...even the big stuff. It's not that serious... "God's miracle-working power is as manifest today as it was in the past. It still works miracles of change in lives and miracles of healing in twisted minds. When a person trusts wholly in God and leaves to Him the choosing of the day and hour, there is God's miracle-working power becoming manifest in that persn's life. So we can trust in God and have boundless faith in His power to make us whole again, whenever He chooses." With God anything is possible.

The devil made me do it! He probably did. Probably got his horns in you-nudging you ever so subtly -in all the right places, at the right time-right when you couldn't take it anymore---or so you thought. Doesn't really matter if you buy into the horns and the pitchfork and the pointy tail...doesn't really matter if you believe in the devil...In fact, that's just the way he likes it. He doesn't want you wondering when he'll strike next or if you'll be his next victim or how he's going to get you sucked into his seductive snare. In fact-Satan doesn't want you to know he exists-because-then you'll know better. You'll be culpable for your actions...for choosing right over wrong, good over evil, God over nothing. You see-the devil likes keeping us in the dark. Letting us believe that we are the masters of our own fate. That God gives us permission to behave badly--because he's always ready to wipe the slate clean. He likes us to believe that w

Always-remember from where you came--you may have to go back there someday. Sometimes-you get sent back-to remember what you've forgotten, or chosen to ignore. De ja vu can be painful-and poignantly jolting. I know someone who isn't looking back-far enough. Someone who sees the trees, but not the forest. A person who picks the present but is plotting for the future. The past and the persons who lived there are "dust in the wind" ... It is important to remember-that our life has a purpose...and the people and the past play a part in the present and in the future. Life is an intricately woven mosaic with a multi colored pattern of pieces that are placed in our path to propel us forward while grounding us in the present. Politicians are very good at projecting pleasing personalities and very good at pretending to put people before personalities. But sometimes-they forget-their promises. Sometimes they put pretense before people...personal desires before personal duty. We

I cannot wrap my mind around evil. I understand the theories and the pscyo mumbo jumbo-but I do not understand it...not really. The girlfriend of the man stabbed in the neck near my house stopped to talk to me today. The attacker plunged the knife in her boyfriend's neck, then asked for his wallet...When the victim said there was no wallet, the criminal pushed the knife deeper into the poor man's neck before dropping him. That cold. That icy cold. Who can do that?! Who can cause such pain-and never look back? Not me. I mean it. I look back every time I so much as raise my voice to another human being. If I gossip or get greedy or get mad....I look back over and over and over again. Something always tells me I should have tried harder, turned the other cheek faster, let go and let God- get in the way sooner. I can't recall a time I have ever been able to just drop a bombshell without thinking twice, trying to retrieve my actions or re-written my script. Call it a c

Jacob is gifted...spiritually gifted. At 11, he sees clearly--the silent wonders that God has designed. Jacob drew me a picture. A large cone shaped object-wide at the bottom narrow at the top...rows of objects filled the inside...gradually getting smaller as they rose to the top...two hearts with crosses in the center were placed on either side of the cone...and one sentence- WHERE IS LOVE? Jacob explained "You know how in movies when the martians invade and suck up everything from the earth?" "This is God sucking up all the evil...all the bad things-and leaving behind the Love. That's deep. Really deep. Jacob sees what some of us never even imagine...He understands what most of us refuse to consider...He thinks about possibilities that most of us prefer to avoid. Jacob is my fourth son...I had difficulty conceiving him after a devastating second miscarriage. On the day he entered this world, my friend called and said "How about that scripture reading?!" I

My doorbell rang at midnight. A deputy stood there. My heart dropped. Were my two older sons okay?! A man had just been rushed to the hospital...stabbed in the neck, two hours earlier...He lay in an empty lot next to my home-for two hours...unable to move...bleeding profusely...crying out for help. I couldn't believe it. I'd heard nothing...within the walls of my home-I didn't hear the scuffle as a man with a knife, grabbed a jogger and demanded his wallet. There was no wallet...who carries a wallet while jogging?! Not me...not this man...So the robber-gets mad...and stabs his victim--in the neck no less I felt awful...that it happened...next to my house...that a criminal had been lurking in the bushes...waiting for a victim...preying on an innocent man...And I felt horrible-that he lay there for 2 hours...scared and in pain...and nearly bleeding to death... I wish I had heard him...had walked outside to empty the trash or to take a stroll or to simply get some air...maybe

I love America. I love the freedoms we have-even when we feel confined. I love our openness, our diversity, our love of life in all its forms...I love how we mix and mingle and make the most out of our situations--even when something is going terribly wrong. But mostly, I love our heroism...and our steadfast determination to reach for the stars--to dream the impossible dream...because dreams really do come true--if we simply believe...in the dream, that all men and women are created equally...with equal probabilities and possibilities-- to pull off the miraculous. I was a child of integration...a product of the public school system in the 70's....when busing and mixing the masses into one poi pourri of human goulash seemed like a good idea---to someone-somewhere. In theory-it would promote understanding, fellowship and the equality that some were being denied. But in reality, it promoted division and disappointment and dumb misunderstanding. The African American kids were bused acr

THE PRAYER OF ST. FRANCIS Lord, make me a channel of thy peace, that where there is hatred, I may bring love: that where there is wrong, I may bring the spirit of forgiveness; that where there is discord, I may bring harmony; that where there is error, I may bring truth; that where there is doubt, I may bring faith; that where there is despair, I may bring hope; that where there are shadows, I may bring light; that where there is sadness, I may bring joy. Lord, grant that I may seek rather to comfort than to be comforted; to understand, than to be understood; to love, than to be loved. For it is by self-forgetting that one finds. It is by forgiving that one is forgiven. It is by dying that one awakens to Eternal Life.

We have wasps. I don't know why-or how-but they've come to visit...inside my bedroom, downstairs in the kitchen and tonight in the den. They are roaming through our home as if they belong there-which they don't. I'm not scared that we'll get stung...or afraid to swat them...I'm simply annoyed that they are trespassing on my domain...my place of peace where I want to lay my weary head without wondering when they may decide to land on me. Tonight I reached for my kitchen towel and almost grabbed a wasp by accident. That's happened before...one got stuck in my dishrag and ouch...I got stuck in the finger...One day as I walked in my flip flops through the grass...a bee landed in between the bottom of my foot and the sole of the flip flop...and agh!!!the sting really stung. So I guess in a moment I'll peruse the house with a flashlight and find the opening or the nest or whatever is opening the way for this fanciful flight of insects...What a nuisance-a pesty

Prayer is communication. Faith is the belief that our prayers will be carried to God. That our communication will be heard...that God will do for us what we cannot do for ourselves. The determined belief that prayer is our pipeline upstairs is perhaps the most pious understanding of the simplicity of our relationship with our creator...our higher power...the one who rules the roost high above the fullness our understanding. For if we really understood...if we moved beyond the power of prayer-to the promises that persist long after we have abandoned our purpose...Prayer would be our emotional, physical and spiritual marathon from which we would never retire, resign or resolve to get right-manana. Tonight I pray, that my faith will carry me through tomorrow, to the surrender of a steadfast faith and conviction that God is hearing me loud and clear....but that his work cannot be done...until the spirit is willing...and the will is no longer mine...but his.

The Trojans attacked me. The viruses invaded. My computer looked like a pubescent, pimple faced adolescent. The pop ups popped every time I tried to navigate to this page or that page or to this blog for this days post. Thank God for the computer wizards with the arsenal of disc weaponry that wipes out all evidence of the blight that messes with the mind and the menu that is our computer memory. "You have a security problem!" "Yes I do and it's you--you don't belong on my screen so zap-you're gone!"...Pesty creatures...but hardly harmless...It's never happened to me--but I'm told these alien viruses can completely disable you...and your computer. Seems someone-somewhere in my home searched far and wide to wonderlands that like to send infections to the unsuspecting Internet surfer. No more fun in the sun! Only dark, dismal days of sickly road hazards. So tonight-I stand firmly planted in my resolve to wipe the slate clean, block the rocky roads o

"You are a different kind of special mom. What kind? You overcame alcohol...you are caring, helpful, generous, always trying to find out what God wants you to do." The word according to 11 year old Jacob. "God is very happy with you!" The gospel according to 10 year old Zachary. Just when I want to spend too much time giving in and giving away my power-my higher power, my kids set me straight...soaring straight for the stars. We talked as I put them to bed last night. Chatted about things that were going on in our lives...things we're all doing right and some things we need to get right. And just when I think I've messed up again...or it's time to feel blue...wide eyed and wonderful, they remind me that mom is amazing-in their eyes. It doesn't take much-just a little old fashioned. I'd come from a women's AA meeting where everyone shared a piece of their story...One woman had a long wild ride that spanned 35 years...before she stopped drinkin

"There is greatness in doing something you hate for the sake of someone you love." Rabbi Shmuley Boteau So true. Let's ponder that.

The disease of addiction is cunning, baffling and powerful. The program of recovery is unquestionably-spiritually miraculous. There is no other venue-where so many diverse individuals come together daily, to share their failings, feelings of futility and their future hopes-for a God centered life. There they learn the true spirit of surrender, letting go and letting God-and the gift of unconditional love. I have personally learned that tragedies can be turned into triumphs and enemies into best friends. Old ideas, prejudices and selfish thoughts, resentments and anger... feelings of betrayal and rejection slowly disappear...replaced by a serenity and a subtle acceptance of life on life's terms. In the journey that is this life...my hope is to move forward with the spirit of good intentions, the knowledge that true reform is a daily process, that rebuilding lives is essential to rebuilding families and that the evolution of the soul can only be accomplished through a childlike faith

Evil is all around us. I hate to say it, but it's true. Be aware, be on guard and be relentless in your pursuit of good. Some people don't like to talk about the dark side...or to give it much thought...and that's fine. But never, ever forget it is there...lurking around every corner...waiting until we slip or slumber or slide down the slippery slope of denial..straight into the arms of evil. Some political slam ads came in the mail today. The two candidates have launched an assault attack that is deadly. The war of words are sending out an evil energy that rivals any arsenal of weapons. You see-our words leave deep, painful wounds...which are often- much more damaging than physical attacks. And when those words come in the mail...countless innocent lives are affected. It began with one mean and twisted attack ad...then the retaliation...fiercely damaging...and then today...they blasted each other and the voters with anger driven accusations that have left me feelin

It rained hard today. I took my walk anyway. I had to shower afterwards, so it made sense to get wet. Is that nuts or what?! Sometimes I still like to break away from the norm...to walk in the rain-just because...to forgive someone--just because-I don't really want to...and to look optimistically to the future-just because the present isn't always so endearing. Broadening our horizons doesn't take any extra money or time or even talent...we simply need a giant leap of faith...in ourselves, in our instincts and in our inner voice. The voice that says the rain won't melt you or forgiveness is your greatest asset or optimism will open up a whole new world of opportunity. In fact, some brand new opportunities are unfolding rather quickly and I am actually a bit nervous...Nothing is almost safer than something-if you know what I mean. In fact, emptiness can be filled with grounding because too much of something can send us spiraling down a slippery slope. But that's when

God doesn't make broken people. It just doesn't happen that way. Sometimes we stumble, we fall, we break ... but God doesn't make us broken. Sometimes we try to fix what's not broken ... and that never works - because if it's not broken - you can't fix it. It's that simple. But, sometimes our brokenness -makes us see cracks and blemishes and problems in other people-and even in ourselves...that just aren't there. Sometimes what we see-isn't what we're accustomed to seeing--so we get scared...and we say some awful things....to the people we love...So sometimes, when that happens, we simply need to take a break...to sit back and let God do the work...with us, through us...and together---because that's the best way-the only sure fire way...to see clearly...what is broken and what is not. A woman I know said she failed her family. She never fit into their expectations. She never lived up to their hopes and dreams. She always felt...and still do

I called my kids in for dinner tonite..."Hurry-I poured the milk ...the cereal is going to get soggy!" They bounded through the door...and screeched-"Sushi!" "You're the best mom!" Big hugs-kisses...you know the drill...when they're thrilled...But can you imagine - over raw fish?! They were whispering to each other about their dinner desires... before we left the house this morning..."She'll never go for it." I heard them agree. They know we're on a budget...and besides...when did Sushi become the meal du jour?! On the take out menu no less?! When I was a kid-(here I go sounding like my dad) a McDonald's hamburger made me feel like Christmas had arrived early. As military brats we moved a lot -and that's really the only time I really remember getting take out dinner. What has happened to America? I guess I should ask- what has happened to American parents-like me? I used to over indulge...often...but those days are long go

Somewhere between here and eternity. That's life on earth. Life in this realm. A life worth living, until the next chapter...the final chapter...with the longest running repeat performance. It's California weather today-in Louisiana. I'll take it. Cool and breezy, sunny and warm...no humidity...no mosquitoes...the best of both worlds for as long as mother nature decides--to be kind. I drove four hours yesterday through the marshland, lush greenery and rolling hills of Louisiana and Mississippi...and I couldn't help but feel the transcendent quality of the gift that is our earth. It is like paradise...the peaceful feeling that wraps around you when the world outside is at its best. I absorbed the gentle warmth of nature's delicate embrace with an understanding of the intrinsic value that is this gift- from God. So much of our lives is wasted on wanting, wooing and wheeling and dealing. Slowing the pace, putting ourselves out there-in the midst of the real world -all