THE LITTLE THINGS OF LIFE!
My son Ben walked through the open door into the world he left behind three weeks ago...He walked into the light of day, just beyond the walls of recovery that have been both his saving grace and his personal prison.
It was the first time in a long time that I had seen him in a t-shirt and shorts. Inside the chilly hospital he covers his thin body from head to toe in sweat pants, a sweatshirt, stocking cap and socks. As I watched him walk, still thin and pale, I reminded myself, that recovery happens one step at a time, one day at a time.
Ben earned a pass for a few hours of fun with family. He made the weight cut-a half a pound a day-and so his long wait-for a few hours of freedom-had arrived. I was so excited for him, wanting to know how he felt-what he was thinking-but he simply said, "Just let me enjoy it."
I understood. There are enough questions in therapy, the last thing he wanted to do was evaluate his feelings during his free time. Besides, there is a confusing mixture of emotions when you are removed from the incubator that has been nurturing you, strengthening you, until you are strong enough to survive on your own. It takes a little while to re-enter the life that you left behind, because the one you have been living in-has become your lifeline and letting go, even for a few hours, can be unsettling-even scary.
We picked up his little brothers from school before going home to see his room and to just hang out, before dinner with his dad. It felt good to have him back-and good to see how happy it made Jake and Zack. Even our house felt happier.
It may not seem like much to most people...But seeing Ben walk out of the hospital and into our home, upstairs to his bedroom and downstairs into the den...meant a lot to me. It means he is slowly, but surely, getting better...Working his recovery, removing his obstacles and taking charge of his life. I kept thinking-it is so true. The little things mean so much...So much more than we ever really understand...The little things are really the big things, that get buried in our busy lives.
Tonight he called-and we made plans for Saturday. A movie, the mall, Mass and of course-dinner at the diner of his choice. Lots of little, every day things-that mean so much more...now that we know so much more-about the gift of life, with the ones we Love so much-like Ben.
It was the first time in a long time that I had seen him in a t-shirt and shorts. Inside the chilly hospital he covers his thin body from head to toe in sweat pants, a sweatshirt, stocking cap and socks. As I watched him walk, still thin and pale, I reminded myself, that recovery happens one step at a time, one day at a time.
Ben earned a pass for a few hours of fun with family. He made the weight cut-a half a pound a day-and so his long wait-for a few hours of freedom-had arrived. I was so excited for him, wanting to know how he felt-what he was thinking-but he simply said, "Just let me enjoy it."
I understood. There are enough questions in therapy, the last thing he wanted to do was evaluate his feelings during his free time. Besides, there is a confusing mixture of emotions when you are removed from the incubator that has been nurturing you, strengthening you, until you are strong enough to survive on your own. It takes a little while to re-enter the life that you left behind, because the one you have been living in-has become your lifeline and letting go, even for a few hours, can be unsettling-even scary.
We picked up his little brothers from school before going home to see his room and to just hang out, before dinner with his dad. It felt good to have him back-and good to see how happy it made Jake and Zack. Even our house felt happier.
It may not seem like much to most people...But seeing Ben walk out of the hospital and into our home, upstairs to his bedroom and downstairs into the den...meant a lot to me. It means he is slowly, but surely, getting better...Working his recovery, removing his obstacles and taking charge of his life. I kept thinking-it is so true. The little things mean so much...So much more than we ever really understand...The little things are really the big things, that get buried in our busy lives.
Tonight he called-and we made plans for Saturday. A movie, the mall, Mass and of course-dinner at the diner of his choice. Lots of little, every day things-that mean so much more...now that we know so much more-about the gift of life, with the ones we Love so much-like Ben.
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