Miracle Moments

Mayou Angelou once said, "We can dream, fail and still survive." Yup-that's me. I dream big and sometimes I fail big. But I always learn something valuable and I always try to turn my failures into positives. It's the way of life...the way of my life-at least here on this earth. And so far-the good news is that I am surviving. Sometimes by the skin of my teeth....other times with a resilience that surprises even me. The evolution of the body, mind and spirit as we travel the course of our lives is a beautiful transition...even with all the setbacks, challenges and brick walls. Sometimes our experiences are a little hard to swallow...a little difficult to overcome. But if we remain steadfast-focused on our dreams-"We shall overcome." Today-I had to follow through on a decision I have been praying and thinking about for months. Externally it looked to others as if I'd never get to this point...you know the drill-long pauses, gentle urges...soulful advice. ...

Do you feel comfortable in your own skin? I know that sounds like a crazy question-but think about it. Do you really feel comfortable with who you are-in any situation-with any person...in your own skin? My girlfriend poured her heart out to me last night...she's struggling with whether or not to postpone a pending divorce...the final signing comes Friday. So we talked...and talked and talked...and after she unloaded all the problems she has with her estranged husband...all the reasons why they may never make it...she still isn't sure whether or not she wants the divorce. When she gets right down to it...her wavering feelings have less to do with him...and alot to do with her. Over the last year and a half she has changed...for the better--grown up...and given away some of the old emotional baggage that weighed her down...that made her feel uncomfortable in her own skin. Oh sure-world war II had begun building long before their separation and it exploded into a full fledged bat...

My brother sent me a gift today- wrapped in timeless words of wisdom. "...The rock of my strength and my refuge, is in God. Trust in Him at all times...pour out your heart before him, God is a refuge in us." My brother knows trouble is swirling around me-testing me, taunting me, telling me that I am in for another challenging conflict. But, this time 'round I'm turning the other cheek. Walking away from the old pitfalls that pulled me into the endless struggles between competing polarities....My old perception that every conflict turns into combat- kept me narrow minded and closed to the unlimited possibilities for personal growth. Imagine making friends instead of enemies by simply taking responsibility for our own lives instead of focusing on fear, hate or retribution. Since I've been there and done that...more times than I care to count...I've learned that sometimes when we blame others for our problems--rather than trying to find positive solutions-we are ...

Just breathe! I learned to breathe...at a course I took a few months ago- The Art of Living...I know that sounds odd...learning to breathe-but it's true and proper breathing is an art! Most of us take breathing for granted...when in fact breathing provides 99% of our entire oxygen and energy supply. It's the only bodily function that we can do both voluntarily and involuntarily. Optimum breathing can lead to optimum health. Breathing drives the nervous system...and when that system is out of balance...our bodies and our minds begin to break down...leading to emotional issues like stress, anxiety and depression and chronic health issues like cancer, heart disease and high blood pressure. The Art of Living taught me the powerful breathing technique, Sudarshan Kriya or healing breath. Cycles of rhythmic breathing which over time, infuses you with renewed energy by cleansing the system from the inside. The next time you feel anxious or upset, depressed or fearful-take a deep breath...

It's that time of the month-(girls you know what I mean)- and I'm feeling discombobulated. I'll bet you've never heard that word before-but I use it for lack of a better term. Discombobulated. For a few days each month I experience emotions with a poignancy that surpasses my general moods swings. I used to avoid those feelings like the plague. But, believe it or not as I've evolved through the years, I've grown comfortable with those feelings. I even try to still myself, to get to the heart of what I'm feeling, and work through the issues that spawn the sudden tears, or fears or resentments or pain. So often in life we cling tightly to the good times, the good feelings and avoid experiencing at all cost-the painful, hurtful emotions. We run from them, bury them and suffocate ourselves in the process. Eventually-whether we like it or not-what goes in, must come out...so the internal geyser erupts and spews forth deep seeded, repressed emotions. I've learn...

The phone rings and wakes me up. It's 5 a.m. "Ok, see you in a few minutes," comes the cheery voice at the other end of the line. Our morning rendezvous sends me stumbling down the hall into the bathroom to slip on my shorts, shirt and tennis shoes. I pull my long hair into a pink baseball cap, stuff some money and my phone into my pocket and out the door I fly into the dark morning. Our nocturnal walks through the neighborhood and around the park have opened up a brave new world for me... bonding with some real life leading ladies-Helene and Sissy. Now Helene is the ring leader. She is the wake up Muse and it was her bright idea this week to rise and shine thirty minutes earlier. "It's cooler," she justifies...Sissy and I agree--besides who has the energy to argue that early in the morning? As the days have passed, we've morphed into our routine...getting up is a ritual we look forward to-on most days anyway...In the beginning I awoke three or four time...

Love can tame the savage beast...and it's a beautiful sight. I saw this in living color this morning on the Today show. The video is old-but it's timeless. Two men raised a 35 pound lion cub in their London neighborhood ... feeding, frolicking and loving him as they would a child. When he grew into a 185 pound adult, they released their beloved Christian - as they named him - into the wilds of Kenya to run free with the other animals. As time passed the men decided to visit Christian one last time...against the advice of the "experts"...who warned Christian would not remember them and would revert to his wild nature which could be dangerous. The video proves the experts wrong ...capturing an emotional reunion. Christian is seen walking slowly toward his two friends, then suddenly running and leaping into their arms...licking and pawing and showering them with a joyous, exhilerating love. He bounces back and forth between the men, obviously unable to contain his exc...

He looked no more than 24-but he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. This preppy young man, tall, dark and handsome-we'll call him Joe-stared absently at the floor as he cried out for help. He said his life had begun to spin out of control ... he felt powerless and lost....This weekend Joe spent three nights in a jail cell for failing to pay a longstanding traffic ticket...his relationships were a mess and there were problems at work. He wanted to drink, but he didn't. Instead-he came to this place, this room...it had become his lifeline...this was the one place-that he could get some good honest advice from strangers that he trusts. These people understand his pain..they've been there...through the same desperate, struggles- the daily depression, anxiety and worry...the feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness and shame...But Joe also knows somehow they've found a solution here and he wants what they have. They're smiling-but he's not. You see Joe ...

I've heard it said that Sunday is supposed to be a day of rest. But for me-it was the day to pick up the clutter. I read recently that if you want to clean up your life, first take inventory of your surroundings. If you have clothes tossed onto chairs, a messy desk or dishes that need to be washed...then it's a physical sign of disorder in your life...and disorder means chaos is just around the corner. So I set to the task of straightening up my bedroom...Containers of clothes and tons of shoes were patiently waiting to be transferred to their rightful place-the closet- or in most cases Goodwill. I just moved again-back into my old house- and the nomadic lifestyle my children and I have been living has left me afraid to put down roots and unpack. But carpe diem! I seized the day and sorted, stacked and sized up a lifetime of collectibles which clearly--I no longer needed. I put a lot of things in the giveaway pile...but honestly- I kept far too many items -simply because I can...

Mona didn't show up this week-at the battered women's meeting. I was worried. The social worker said-"no news is good news." I sure hope so. Last week I watched Oprah interview a woman burned alive by her estranged husband. He came to her job--poured gasoline over her and lit a match-turning her into a blazing human inferno. If that's not shocking enough-she said a judge-a man-had just recently removed the restraining order against her husband-the legal piece of paper that was supposed to protect her...to keep her abuser from going near her. We all know a piece of paper can't stop a killer...but at the very least it is a red flag that something is wrong and that someone in the legal system believes the victim. If you're worried someone you know is being abused...here are some other red flags. First, it's all about power and control... The batterer in a relationship tries to dominate and control the other person through the use of physical, verbal and/o...

Flowers are often picked just before full bloom-at their most vibrant stage, long before they wither and fade away. No one knows why-but the same thing happens to some people in the prime of their lives--like my little sister. Ten years ago this month, a brain aneurysm sent Patricia into a coma-and she never woke up. She was 33 years old. We were asked to pull life support from her slumbering body, after her brain died -when the young woman we loved dearly-had clearly crossed over from this world into the next. It was a journey none of us had expected her to take-so soon. As I flew from my home in New Orleans to be with her in Tampa, I kept wondering why-why she had to die--why this generous young soul had been picked before she had completely bloomed... why her five month old son , Daniel and her four year old daughter Sarah had to lose their mom-before they really got to know her. I cannot fully comprehend their pain. I do remember wondering if Patricia had a premonition or a mother...

There are some people who are born- Old Souls. Prophetically poignant personalities who inspire us- with a wisdom that takes most people a lifetime to understand. I met an Old Soul-a young child- at a refugee camp in Croatia. A little Muslim girl no more than 12- who disarmed me with her luminescent love for humanity. She lived in a small, sparsely furnished room that she shared with her mother and her sister... inside an old school building that had been turned into makeshift apartments...for countless families forced to flee their war ravaged towns and villages. She told me her father and her brother had been killed in the war, her house had been bombed and her dreams of a carefree childhood- shattered. She didn't know if she would ever be able to return to her home, or if she would ever be able to see her relatives or her friends again. She had been living in this camp for weeks because she had nowhere else to go...and it looked like the war would never end. I asked this young g...

Howard Storm died in a Paris hospital, then came back to life. But first-he saw hell. Somehow-he crossed over into that dark abyss that no one wants to consider-and then lived to tell about it. No one was more surprised then him-or more afraid. You see-Howard didn't believe in the afterlife. He was an atheist who had stopped believing in God a long time ago. He believed that when the lights went out-when the final curtain fell-that was all she wrote. He was wrong-dead wrong. When I interviewed Howard he told me that to his terror he had landed in the "sewer of the universe" a dark, ugly hole of hate and horror-with no way out. And for the first time ever-he was sorry. Sorry for not believing and for giving up on God. And just that quickly-in that one split second of remorse-God-the one Howard had spent a lifetime ignoring- reached right in and saved him from the dark side-saved him from himself. You see with his steadfast disbelief-Howard had created his own painful Hel...

Mona may not make it through the night. She sleeps with a man who sleeps with a knife. He is the same man who verbally, emotionally and physically assaults her by day. It's been this way since she married him more than four years ago. But she can't bring herself to leave. She is afraid for herself, for her four year old son-and even for her abuser. Imagine that-worrying about the man who hits her, stomps on her feet and threatens her life. Mona is trying to win his approval-to change him-in hopes that he will love her and protect her and that her life will evolve into the fairytale she dreamed about as a child growing up in Lithuania. But tonight-as she shared her story in a room filled with battered women, Mona admitted her fairytale dream had turned into a living nightmare....and that she is in fact a prisoner of her own fear. An unwitting accomplice to the abuse that is slowly sucking the life out of her. Mona is trying to summon the courage to leave-again. This time for goo...

Hi- I'm in good spirits tonite...one of my five sons turned 11-a bright, spiritually gifted child...makes me smile just thinking about him...He's my big cheerleader-giving me sage words of wisdom when I need it most...profoundly poignant thoughts that leave an indellible imprint on the psyche and the soul. He went to the movies with his brothers-so I went to a women's recovery meeting...another bright hour in my day. They come from all walks of life...young and old, rich and poor, straight and gay, black and white...and they come to support each other in the recovery from addiction..from alcohol or drugs or both. How and why I got there-well-that's another story-for another time-but I can honestly tell you-I'm finally okay with it...being there, one of them...among them, clean and sober, sharing my story, passing on my hope and finally feeling that our flaws can flower into the most beautiful, fragrant gardens filled with bouquets of love and joy and peace. I didn...

Okay-indiscretion, infidelity-instant migraine headache! Boy-humans get weak at the knees-then crumble at the slightest provocation, backsliding to the days of grunting cavemen whose primitive power piqued and quivered at the mere batting of an eyelash! The power of prayer is the best I can offer to this hurting young family...it soothes the soul, sensitizes the nerves to never give up on the hope that this ugly, debilitating feeling--yes this too-shall pass! It doesn't matter which challenges we face-or how many times we have to climb out of the rubble of the messes we make-the very best we can do is to live life on life's terms, one day at a time-reaching outward and upward to a power that is greater than ourselves and therefore the guiding light to holistic wisdom, the fullness of true understanding and the foundation of eternal peace!

"This too shall pass"...Those words kept coming to me today-after hearing about a suffering friend...a mom of three toddlers whose marriage is on the rocks...Rippling waves of sadness passed through me-a painful reminder of the wounds that scar the soul...then silently weep whenever a woman is wounded. As I lay in a hospital bed-suffering from a disease, an impending divorce and the disabling emotional exhaustion that follows a lifetime of incredible highs and incredible lows...I rolled over-and there, carved into my bedstand, four simple-yet illuminating words "This too shall pass." It did-many moons later-after buckets of tears, too many tirades and tons of knee bending prayer. Graces from a power greater than myself, gently consoled me, carried me and inspired me to believe that if I just held on tightly-a miracle makeover designed just for me -could move my mountain of problems and save me-from myself! Believe in yourself! A miracle-makover-is just around the co...