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Showing posts from December, 2008

Emotional Artillery

I don't know exactly what I want to say tonight. So I'll just type--and let the feelings roll out... My five sons and I just left counseling...and I'm emotionally spent. I imagine they are too. It was tough...but one of the most successful sessions thus far. I cried, one of my older sons cried, anothers eyes welled up....and the rest chimed in with their soulful reflections of life in our broken family. Yes-we're broken, battered and bruised...but not destroyed. In fact, as hard as this seems...it's clear to me-we're getting stronger every single day. It takes a lot of courage to call out for help and to honestly hear what each person is really trying to say. A lot of people I know will never go there...to get help, to seek guidance or to listen to what we are doing to hurt the ones we Love. But we're doing it...and I'm grateful-to my sons for standing in the line of fire. I took some emotional hits tonight...and rightfully so--but I'm relieve

FAMILY

"Tis the season-to be-grateful for your family. For the gift...for the dynamics and for the Love that comes within the family unit that God uniquely delivered to each one of us. We often take that for granted-and sometimes discover too late--that family is the sole purpose and the only profession that really ever matters. Sure it can get complicated...different personalities-different desires--dumb disagreements and dirty little lies...But-like it or not--we're in this together...and united we stand, divided we fall. Having traveled the world -I've discovered every culture has its own unique family codes...expectations and internal language. But that's just the window dressing...Because when you get right down to it--God designed our families- for our eternal benefit...It's where we learn the lessons of Love, compassion, patience, service...and the true value of our fundamental gift, the gift of life. My favorite role model is the Holy Family. They stuck togethe

NO ROOM AT THE INN

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Can you imagine-being in labor--far from home--and no room at the hospital or the hotel or the Inn?! Think about it...no vacancies anywhere...except-inside a stable surrounded by animals and hay and dirt. No deluxe, single room...no white sheets or fluffy pillows, no monitors or anaesthesia...no doctors or nurses or heart monitors...just mom and dad...and a huge dose of faith. This is the night, Mary and her husband Joseph--after traveling miles and miles by donkey, traveling day and night...sought refuge... so their only son...the baby Jesus-could be born. And that is exactly what happened...The Christ child came into the world in an obscure setting, with no fanfare, or friends or relatives standing by...just his parents...and of course- God. Humble beginnings for the child who Christians will agree-would become the single most important figure in the history of humanity. A carpenter's son, a mother anointed like no other-a prophet and a savior...the Bethlehem babe-hailed hope, ho

Football Follies!

"It's a death field out there...It's eat or be eaten!" "What?!" I replied..."What are you talking about?" My 11 year old son Jacob ran inside, poured himself a glass of milk and exclaimed, "Why don't they just give up-Mack and I are winning every time." "Ben and Zack don't stand a chance!" "It's getting to the point that it's not any fun--they're desperate!" Just four of my five sons "frolicking' outside on the front lawn...football style. Yes it's rough-I carried out some trash and I wanted no part of it. But they were laughing and lunging and letting it all hang out--old fashioned brotherly Love! No one can ever accuse my brew of being sissys or wallflowers or quiet as mice...believe me-no one--unless they're deaf, dumb and blind...You can hear them for miles around...most of the time...except when they're sleeping soundly--(silently slumbering like their 23 year old brother i

MARY'S EMBRACING FAITH

The Blessed Mother is standing on the front lawn--around the corner and a few blocks from my house. She appeared this week out of nowhere...inside her own private grotto, surrounded by roses, for all the world to see...or at least all the cars passing by her busy little street. I was so touched seeing her there...tall and grey stone, arms outstretched...welcoming passersby- reaching out in motherly care...offering her heavenly embrace, right here on earth. She stands on dry, well manicured land...where a river of floodwater once flowed, filling the streets and the homes with washed away memories in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina...and she stands now, for strength and hope and the promise of a bright future--because God is with us...and her son is among us--in every random act of kindness, generosity and goodwill that we have given freely and lovingly to those who least expect it. I did not expect to see her there...in front of this lovely new home...that I have passed countless ti

UPDATE

Jacob's face is deflating...the swelling almost gone...the penicillin working wonders. X-rays at the dentist showed nothing...so it was on to the doctor... who diagnosed a swollen gland...caused by an infection...how or why-we don't know...but we'll keep a watch and hopefully the coast is clear from here on out... Zachary (and I) got an At on the volcano--so once again- "mother knows best" as I always remind my boys...The grand finale-made the cut, without all the headaches and scurrying around like years past... Tonight we put up our dazzling Christmas tree...somehow we're all laid back...took out the one we stored in the attic...dressed her up...and ta da...we're happy! I don't know what it is, but I guess we're simply grateful for being home...with our family in tow...and the bountiful blessings of health and happiness...So all the window dressings seem like extras-- Besides, Christmas lives at our house year round...We own a full size snow s

TWO WOLVES

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One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people He said, "My son, the battle is between two 'wolves' inside us all. ONE IS EVIL. It is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority and ego. THE OTHER IS GOOD. It is joy, peace, Love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith." The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf wins?" The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed." (A friend sent me this story inside a Christmas card...I don't know who the author is...But I feel it is poignantly powerful...worth reading over and over again.)

QUE SERA SERA!

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My son Jacob came home today looking disfigured. The right side of his face, swollen like a ball...fever caused a throbbing headache...and fear made him cry. He knew he was headed to the dentist...maybe an abscess...certainly a shot. He's been there and done that and for a child...and probably for most adults...it's a trip he'd rather see re -routed. But you know the story--there's no room at the Inn---until the morning...so the best I could accomplish is a penicillin prescription, some Motrin for the swelling...and a whispered prayer for relief. You see-when it rains it pours. This is exam week...tomorrow are two critical exams...Math and Science...and neither pique Jake's interest. In fact, those are facts he'd rather shelve in exchange--for just about anything else. You see-like st. Augustine, Jacob likes thinking about the unthinkable...reaching for the stars instead of counting them...analyzing the heavens...instead of calculating how to get there. But ever

SINGING SOULS

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I sat in the last row at morning mass... not feeling too well...But then -watching in silent wonder as the singing souls stood in unison...collectively rising to the occasion...praising and worshiping a God they could not see...but whom they deeply believed in. If you think about it--and really see-through the eyes of faith...watching the faithful in church is an amazing spiritual exercise...It is the essence of everything we are lead to believe about community and equality and unity. It is the one place that people put down their humanity and pick up their divinity--without all the baggage and worry of judgement or jaundiced attitudes. It is the one place where the soul within, the driving spiritual force that finds it's way into-even a fools physical fortress--the one place- where we get an authentic glimpse of our spiritual brothers and sisters. Standing side by side, singing songs of soulful Love-or being silent and still and slowing down just long enough to catch up with the o

VOLCANOES-NOT ROCKET SCIENCE!

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Volcanoes are not rocket science! I made one today-with my 10 year old son. In between studying for exams and running kids to basketball practice or games or washing clothes-I made a volcano. So much for the day of rest. I've made so many volcanoes-I think I'm actually getting the hang of them. Zachary wanted to know why we weren't using the play dough and the chicken wire and all the other things his brother used on his volcano last year. Without missing a beat I answered, "Because I got smarter-that's why. I learned something-Keep it simple!" I added, "It will probably turn out better."--and I think it did! Isn't that what school is all about-learning a lesson for the next go round-expanding our horizons and our understanding. Well-I don't know about the kids--but I learned a valuable lesson. Making volcanoes doesn't have to be that complicated or that expensive. Most of the stuff we need is right in front of our faces. The only thing I

The Light at the End of the Tunnel

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"Due to the energy shortage, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off." How funny is that bumper sticker?! But really-how shocking would that be?! How would we know if we were crossing into the light or into the dark? Upstairs or downstairs? The rays of sunshine that seem to greet near deathers could fade away into the dreary fog...if the spiritual energy igniting the flames of burning Love were too weak...muted by the mighty call of the wild--and wonderful world we all revel in down here. Think about it. Sometimes we take for granted that God is going to be there--waiting endlessly for our fannies to march to a different drummer. We seem to think we have all the time in the world...until the next world...to make our mark...even when the messes we make-mess up the important milestones we're supposed to meet. I've never seen the light--at the end of the tunnel I mean--but I've interviewed people who have been there-and lived to tell about it...Unanimo

PURE AS THE DRIVEN SNOW!

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Pure as the driven snow? Hardly! But today-New Orleans looked virgin... A pristine powdery white blanket of snow ...lay bare...wrapping itself in soft, silent protection around the city....from Bourbon street to Kenner, uptown -across the mighty Mississippi...to the Westbank...around Lake Pontchartrain...to the Northshore up and over rolling hills...all the way to the swampy marshlands and bayous of Louisiana. God sent a surprise sunrise that dropped from the heavens this glorious, glistening mantel of protection...that seemed-for a few hours--to purge our land--and produce the most childlike innocence -a winter wonderland--of promise and hope and joyful expectation. The powdery crystals of water and ice gently inspired a deeply spiritual connection between this world and the next...reminding me that God sees exactly what we need-when we need it the most...that Heaven is closer than we think and that the simplest miracles---the most unexpected wonders are waiting to drop in on us...som

HONESTY!

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Honesty- may well be the most difficult moral challenge facing any us. Honesty with ourselves- with each other-with our higher power. Honesty eludes so many of us because we are simply afraid to tell the truth. Plain and simple--we are afraid to tell the truth. Who knows why or where the fear comes from that leads to the dishonesty...but walls go up and lies lay the foundation and the future is fueled by false fantasies of what we want to believe is true--when deep down inside we know that we are lying. There's often no pre-meditation...no planning involved...no overt decision to be covert about the facts..The little white lies just roll out of our mouths, cloud our minds and our memories, until we begin to believe the mysterious tall tales and the seemingly innocuous remarks that are in fact outrageously outlandish lies. Some of the most honest women I know, tonight-honestly shared the dishonesty of their former lives--with a mixture of laughter, disbelief and absolute-relief. It

FEAST OF THE IMMACULATE CONCEPTION

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God always has the last word. But we are always the beneficiaries. December 8th is the Feast of the Immaculate Conception. The day Catholics celebrate the wisdom of God's beautiful handiwork...exempting the Mother of Christ, from original sin...excluding sin from entering her soul...granting her this singular privilege...for the benefit of humankind. It is a soul stirring sign of the connection between our humanity and our divinity. Mary, the new Eve...who would become the mother of the new Adam, Jesus. The salutation of the Angel Gabriel, "Hail, full of grace.." (Luke 1:28) indicates an abundance of grace...a supernatural godlike state of a soul...which finds its explanation in the Immaculate Conception of Mary. It is mindboggling to consider...heartwarming to realize...that God--the master of all creation--anointed one human-a woman...by giving her a special pass to enter this life, without the stain of original sin...to be placed in her mother's womb-free and clear

THE STANDARD BEARER

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I'm grateful when people listen--and even sometimes -when they overhear. My son's friend called tonight to tell me, "You are the standard bearer for your children." I paused-wondering if that was a good thing or not. Yesterday, Emile rode up to my house on his bike and overheard a rather emotional conversation outside. He apologized for intruding but wanted to let me know how he repaired his estranged relationship with his parents. Staying calm-even under fire--staying focused--even when things got rocky and learning that self control was his best defense as well as his best offense. Pretty smart guy. And he added, "Don't let your anger get in the way of the ones you Love." Don't I need to hear that--over and over again?! Now this is a guy who has been tested by fire...schizophrenic, suicidal, bi- polar, recovering addict...and incredibly brilliant. He has struggled to re-gain his sense of himself, his personal purpose and his will to live...and he h

FEEL THE PAIN!

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Sometimes you just have to feel the pain. There's no way around it...and the best way to deal with it--to work through it-is to feel it. Pain is the sign of an open wound...physically--emotionally--a wound that needs time to heal. Working with the pain and through it--is critical--because there is some pain-that try as we may--cannot be ignored-forever. It festers, boils up and eventually penalizes us for placating its purpose...Because there is always a purpose...a reason why we feel pain and a lesson to be learned from it. For years I turned my back on my pain, buried my feelings and ran from the obvious. But I've learned the hard way-the painful truth...Ignoring the pain, only makes things worse, adds insult to injury and eventually causes greater pain than we ever imagined possible. So hang on to your power to overcome the pain...putting your priorities in line...putting you first--until you've released that part of you that clung to the pity and the past and the pathet

115 Years Young!

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Like the energizer bunny she kept on ticking...until her last breath at 115 years young. The oldest living person to cross over-is our reminder of the age defying odds which we can all overcome. You know what they say--it's all in the mind...but sometimes-it comes straight out of the mouth--with little or no thought. I was stunned to hear the sermon-"I know most of us don't want to die-but who wants to live to be that old? Other than her heart beating-what is the quality of her life?" I whispered to my son, "Has he forgotten about her spirit within...her eternal soul...her higher supernatural dimension?!" Call me naive, call me idealistic...or call me anything at all-- but -until her last breath--her quality of life rested in every breath she took. As long as she was breathing-as long as blood pumped through her veins--she had purpose and possibilities and people who loved her. She had value! We are both spirit and matter--internal and external...And our per

FORTUNE COOKIE

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I cracked open the fortune cookie-and there in black and white...my fortune- "YOU HAVE A REMARKABLE POWER YOU ARE NOT USING" Like I haven't heard that before. But really-what power might that be? Think about it...we all have a power we are not using and a purpose we are not fulfilling and a person we should be persuading...and I think the list goes on...So how do you really know what power it is--rather- what "remarkable" power it is-that you are not using. Me--I've got a few good ideas...but I'm afraid to share, because if it's so remarkable...maybe I better wait until I put my power to work, lest I give someone else my idea and then they steal what is meant to be my personal, remarkable power. It's funny though-because I know exactly why I got that fortune cookie and I know exactly what remarkable power I am not using, but which I am carefully cultivating so that I can move it into motion. Timing is everything...and I am waiting for just the ri